Lance Manlode says...the "Oil is Priced To High Edition"

Hey Kids,

I just got finished reading JD's e-mail ...(ssssshhhh..) and came across an interesting article by Chris Gilpin over at "The Rude Awakening." I suppose JD subscribes to said online news doctrine, because there was that, The Times and a few other News sources.

Anyway, Oil is going up to $100 dollars a gallon! Sweet Christ! How am I going to fill up my car? I get paid minimum wage working for The Marc and JD Radio Show (moving to BlogTalkRadio.com/Marcandjd on November 18th) and that's about $3.25/hour. Anywho, I decided to write this, because people should start doing things the Back to the Future way! We need to get Flux Capacitors and start using garbage to power our vehicles. Who needs Iraq's oil!

Love you guys to death,

Lance Manlode.
Senior Vice President to the Mail Room Stock Person/Producer of
The Marc and JD Radio Show

The Real American Gangster ...Lance Manlode.

He reclines back in his EZ Chair, wearing a black robe made out of leather (yes, leather) wearing a pair of black wayfarers with a pipe in his mouth. This is Lance Manlode and this is the self-proclaimed "Bad Boy on the Block."

He refuses to give his age to anyone, even his mother saying: "**** that bitch, she's a tough broad, but she forgot my birthday one year so from then on out, I refused to tell her my age. Then I beat her with a wooden mallet and her memories gone. She's calls me Lennie and touches me inappropriately." Amidst the release of Ridley Scott flick American Gangster he says that Frank Lucas (the antagonist) learned everything he knows from Lanceford T. Manlode.

"Frankie Boy was a little brat when he first came to the hood. Literally, just like a six year old girl. I taught him everything he ****ing knew." Lance then offers me blow, which I politely decline of course, but he does a few lines saying "this is grade-a Asian blow man."

Apparently in all his travels he went to the East of Asia to find cocaine, but found woman instead and started a burlesque show in which he starred as a lion tamer and announcer. "Whoa, Heh, those were good times, man. I really, I really miss them." Lance shed a few tears and then went on to the West of Asia where he met his former wife Ima Chan. Chan went on to marry Charlie Chaplin then she disappeared. Manlode believes that Chaplin killed her with a pick axe in a pizza joint in downtown Chicago.

"Pizza Hut, he killed her in a ****ing Pizza Hut!" Lance stammers, shedding more tears. As far as the police know Chaplin didn't kill Ima Chan, the police don't know who Ima Chan is regardless since she was never actually married to either man. "I got married to her in Vegas, or China, I don't know. There were lights, and stuff."

Even with all his problems and issues Manlode still claims to be the greatest American Villain to have ever lived. He says, "King Kong has nothing on me!" and I have to remind him that Denzel Washington said that in Training Day a few years ago.
"I said it first, Denzel Washington has nothing on me either. Screw him."

When Lance Manlode moved into Harlem, New York, the first few days were self-admittedly; difficult. "Holy ****ing Shit! There was black people every-****ing-where! I was scared to death!" Apparently in his trials and tribulations the Asian government banned Mr. Manlode from living in any part of Asia.

"Who the **** ran Asia back then didn't like the Burlesque business, didn't like the kind of stuff I was selling. So, they wanted me out, they wanted me out like I was a retarded kid in a woman's womb."

I can't help, but sigh at him when he says his last line. He cackles incessantly after saying it, his laugh turning into a rasp and finally a destructive cough. When he coughs, his smokers-cough, you can't help but feel bad for him. "I think I have smoke inhilations..." he says "Maybe something wrong with my lungs, from the smoke inhilations."

If you listen to Lance Manlode ramble on long enough, you'll hear the good stories about Bobby Pianola, or Jack "of all trades" Maloney, and the whores, the money, and the blow. Mainly the blow; "Do you have any blow?" he asks. I remind him that he just offered me some blow, and he admits that the substance he just snorted was "Flour mixed with salt and sugar. Whoa!"

Lance Manlode currently stars on the Marc and JD Radio Show on Nowlive.com/Marcandjd.

The real article for the Frank Lucas shit is found here.

American Gangster was an awesome, awesome flick.

This is why I don't eat powders sugar...

Martina Hingis, former big-shot tennis star has retired midst allegations and a positive drug test revealing cocaine use. Hingis claims innocence and that the cocaine was mixed in with her powdered sugar french toast Denny's platter. When asked for a comment she said:

"I am very sorry it has come to this, I crave the Denny's French Toast Slam, and because a cook senselessly put cocaine in my powdered sugar, I have to suffer. If anyone could get me in touch with him, that'd be great. Seriously, does anyone know him...or his name? Number?"

Hingis claims still that she hasn't done any drugs whatsoever, and once against claims all innocence. In a brief interview Lanceford T. Manlode said:

"She's a fucking stupid person, I don't understand how you can do cocaine. I can only imagine her snorting it off the French Toast Platter. And by the way, Ms. Hingis, his name is Leonard and his number is 555-****"

Manlode doesn't like to talk about his past, but he too, was convicted of using cocaine four years ago, whilst living in Nevada, and starring on hit procedural crime/scientific drama CSI, he states for the record that: "That my life had taken a turn for the worst is my own fault. I had a good thing going there with Horatio Caine and Gary Sinese. I enjoyed working with them." When told that neither of those people were on the show, he went back to the drug use saying "My ****ing head, you know, it's all ****ed up."

While Hingis has retired due to these cocaine related allegations, we at Marc and JD's Blog of Awesomeness still love her and Mr. Manlode says that in time "she'll see the light of her errors, and move back in with him." When told that he never had a relationship with Martina Hingis, he said "...it was Sampras, and it was a bad time in my life. I'm sorry."



For more on this story and others, visit http://sports.espn.go.com/sports/tennis/news/story?id=3089841.. (well for the actual story anyway...)

jd

Stef McFeters

Hey Kids,

It's Lanceford T Manlode here, just letting you know that 'The Marc and JD Radio Show' has a special guest coming in on Sunday Night named Stef McFeters (www.stefmcfeters.com) and she's a graphic artist. It should be pretty awful, you know about Marc and JD already they interview guests like they're interviewing their parents; horridly! Anywho, just thought I'd chime in, I stole JD's password for this crap and decided to get (it) on.

Stef McFeters Sunday 10/21/07 only one NowLive! The Marc and JD Radio Show featuring Lanceford Terrance Manlode Esq.

Plus, don't eat Electrical cords - no matter how good they taste - whoo learned that the hard way.

Lanceford T Manlode Esq.

Just because...

Hello everyone, it's I, JD with a small little post to let everyone know what the fuck is going on in the lives of Marc and JD.

Over the past couple of days Marc has figured out a new way to bring our hit (and I mean rarely listened too) radio show back. The Marc and JD Radio Show ran off and on from 2003-2005, and within those time periods we had a great deal of fun. Lance kept up with his MLB Scoreboard update, Marc and JD did their Entertainment News, and then they bitched about things that were going on in their lives. Things that no one particular wanted to listen to, but did because there was nothing else to do.

Then JD moved to Pennsylvania and to be completely honest it's difficult to do a Radio Show when you live 400 miles away from your partner in crime. Granted, from time to time, JD still calls the occasional convienence store and tells the clerk he's on the recieving end of a contest that doesn't excist. In the past there was the 7-11 delivery guy who didn't really know what Christian Rock was..."Like Creed" "Creed sucks, I like Stryper."

Anyway, I don't want to bore you with the details. Just know, that the Marc and JD Radio Show has returned in the form of a BLOGCAST! Yes, usually it'll be a 45-60 min rant about things ranging from baseball to foreign women, but it'll be interesting and you should definitely be listening.

Either do it, or Lance'll pull a Benoit on you; fucker.

blogtalkradio.com/marcandjd

It's Lanceford T. Manload Says!

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